Mindfulness = 2 Inquires.
By Pablo Das (HHC, SEP)
Professional links in profile.
<You can help me reach others! Repost or send to someone who may find value in this work>
—————
In my coaching practice, I’ll often tell clients that mindfulness can be simplified into two inquiries:
1. What’s happening?
2. How can I respond in a way that supports wellbeing?
These two inquiries have practical value in so many of the scenarios I find myself working in with my clients. Managing addictive impulses, navigating trauma content, stopping eating sugar, relationships and of course, dharma practice.
In this article I’m gonna break down the two inquiries and how they can be utilized in daily life.
Inquiry 1.
The question “what’s happening?” immediately takes us out of ordinary consciousness into reflection. It’s a state of objectivity. As I write this, what’s happening is that the sun is barely coming up. I can feel the breeze on my left side from an air humidifier. I have excitement to be starting a film photography class on Friday. I have a cough that’s hanging on a little too long from that bad flu in December. My cat is in the litter box. My lips are dry. There’s hunger sensations in my belly.
Asking the question “what’s happening” has me looking, listening and noticing sensation and emotion. It’s not so much a state of making meaning but of taking stock.
[I am offering a discounted block of 4 sessions for $599 for first time clients. Use Link-tree in profile or message me directly ]
Traditionally, Buddhist mindfulness asks us to focus that reflective energy in a few very specific places. Those places are the body, the mind and in something called feeling tones. Feeling tone is an acknowledgement of the pleasant or unpleasant quality of any sensory experience (sights, sounds, tastes, smells and sensation). I’ll talk about the importance of feeling tones tomorrow.
Mindfulness notices (mostly) non-judgmentally. Mindfulness is curious. It studies what’s happening. It deconstructs it and looks at its parts. It notices nuance. It notices movement, intensity, duration, frequency and when things resolve or end. It can be a deep and subtle study of one’s internal and external experience in any given moment. It’s available at any time.
Mindfulness has, built into it, a pause. To be reflective means pausing to notice. Built into that pause is the possibility of choice. To me, this is the practical power of mindfulness. When that reflective pause happens, you can decide how to respond.
Inquiry 2.
“How Can I Respond in a Way That Supports Wellbeing”?
Earlier I said that mindfulness notices non_judgementally. That's not entirely true. What we could "judge" is how what we've done in the past has conditioned our experience now or how what we do next, might condition the experience we have later. IN that sense it "judges" through an ethical lens. Not only does mindfulness allow us to respond with intention rather than react unconsciously, but it offers shape to our response. I like to encourage my clients to think in terms of responding in ways that support wellbeing for oneself and others. There’s a kind of ethical framework built into that. It challenges us to consider the impact of our actions on others and to reflect on how we may self generate suffering for ourselves. We try to minimize both impacts.
Whether you are craving alcohol but sober, feeling overwhelmed by work, in conflict with a partner or family member, or considering how to respond to political realities, you can always filter what you do next through the framework of minimizing harm for yourself and others.
I’m a gluten free person. When I eat wheat, I want to pass out and then the next day, I feel like I drank all night. It’s super unpleasant. When I first stopped eating wheat, I did so with a friend. We had an agreement that when we wanted to eat pizza or bread or whatever, that we would text one another, describe what we were feeling and then say what we were gonna do instead. So I might have texted something like “hey, I so wanna go to Tony’s pizzeria but I’m gonna get some chicken and vegetables and a kombucha instead”. Chicken and vegetables happens to be a very grounding meal for me. This is a practical example of noticing what’s happening and forming a response that supports well-being. What I wanted to do was something that would have been a setback. But what I decided to do was to ground myself.
So. Here’s your practice:
1. What’s happening?
2. How can I respond in a way that supports wellbeing?
Pablo Das is trained as a Buddhist teacher and as a Holistic Wellness coach (HHC). He is a practitioner of Somatic Experiencing (SEP) and is an advocate for a trauma centered, Buddhist approach to recovery from Addiction Patterns.
See professional links in Profile.